Unlike anything you have seen today, the trajectory I had pointed me elsewhere. Starting out as a delinquent, I have progressed to take on various leadership positions, surprising many who once knew me as a troubled youth.
From Beng to B.Eng, from OOC to OC, this is how I would describe my journey from a youth delinquent to an NTU Graduate, from a OCS dropout to an Air Force OC.
A rough start.
Entering secondary school after scoring the second last in class for my PSLE, I found myself in a place infested with secret societies then.
I was frequently beaten up, while at the same time getting into trouble. Soon, like those who bullied me, I became known for the wrong reasons.
I was relegated to Normal Academic Stream after scoring the last of my entire cohort.
Not wanting to drop out of school yet, I decided to work hard for O Levels and topped my level, surprising everyone including myself when I receive three awards for my O levels.
New-found confidence.
I soon enter polytechnic with overflowing confidence. From a former delinquent, I become one of the top performers.
I graduated well and had several accolades, even as I stumbled at the midpoint and missed my certificate of merit by a small margin.
I took on an additional three modules not computed into my GPA, went on three overseas study trips and was shortlisted as a potential Valedictorian.
I was soon conscripted and also excelled in basic military training, emerging as the Best Trainee for my platoon. From being questioned as a leader, I became respected by most in the company. When I was tasked to command the passing out parade, I became known as the “Company Second Best”.
However, I soon met an unexpected hurdle after being posted into OCS.
From the top to the bottom.
As an Officer Cadet, I found myself questioning many of the things that we were asked to do. I could not find the answers that I needed and I did not want to go through my officer course simply following motion. In the end, when I questioned myself why would I be doing this, the first answer that came to mind was the higher allowance. I realised that I have deviated from my original cause of wanting to serve and I am convinced that I will not make a good Officer even if I am eventually commissioned. In the end, I requested to be taken out of course while making the promise that I must one day return if I am able to believe that I will make a good Officer.
I soon sunk to the bottom of my morale and it took me a long time to revert to my usual self. I was posted from place to place and eventually ended up in MIDS Wing as an Exam Clerk.
As I regain my confidence, I was able to perform better. I eventually completed my national service with “Outstanding” for both my conduct and performance, albeit as a Corporal.
A second blow.
Nearing the end of my conscription, I finally entered one of the top public university in Singapore after several applications.
While my grades were generally good, it was then a highly competitive time for polytechnic graduates to enter University. I did not get the course that I wanted to pursue but was instead offered Computer Engineering. Without A-Math background, I struggled.
At the same time, I also had to fund my own expenses as financial support from my family were unstable. Eventually, I decided to take a leave of absence.
An unconventional path.
After leaving school, I had many endeavours. I started a social enterprise providing training for youth and youth at risk. I also joined a law firm and a bank for a brief period. The experience with the law firm was so bad that it affected me for many years later.
Just when I was contemplating if I should return to NTU, I chanced upon a job advertisement by OBS. I thought that joining the the public service is where I can do what is right and what I am passionate about, without constantly worrying about the P&L, after seeing how some firms prioritise profits over ethics.
OBS wasn’t exactly a walk in the park as I had to be first selected over 3 days 2 nights and complete an eight months training. But I eventually became an Instructor and got married shortly after.
After my wedding, my university told me they would strike off my name if I did not return to complete my degree immediately. With my superior’s blessing, I decided to study full-time while continuing to work full-time by taking half the academic load per semester of 3 modules per semester instead of 6.
Braving through the storm.
During a routine check-up, my wife had to deliver immediately due to some abnormalities discovered. My first child spent some time in the NICU before discharging and we thought all was good. A few months later, my child was diagnosed with end stage renal disease and soon underwent chemotherapy.
What follows is a few years of dialysis where there were many incidents such as contamination due to dialysis supply defects. We almost lost our first baby twice.
Together with my wife, we manage the health condition of my child, spending countless nights at the hospital.
Finally graduating.
Eventually, I managed to finish what seemed like an impossible task. After almost ten years since enrolment, I completed my undergraduate studies with more credits than a double degree student due to my double minor in Psychology and Entrepreneurship.
Upon completing my degree, the thought of going back to the military to “pay my dues” resurfaced. I applied for all three services and RSAF was the first service to offer me an opportunity to serve and I went ahead.
Back to the military.
During my residential training in SAFTI MI, my wife was pregnant with my second child who later underwent two major surgeries at birth. My first child was still undergoing dialysis then and it was a challenging period. Thankfully, my wife understood how important this is to me as it will fulfil what I have promised to myself.
Training were challenging as I had to change my mindset from an instructor to a trainee, mingling with colleagues almost two decades younger. My outspoken nature also ruffled some feathers.
Eventually I was shortlisted as one of the nominees for the Sword of Honour award which came as a surprise to me.
I was eventually posted as an Officer Commanding (OC) in one of the airbases in Singapore.
One less kidney. One more degree.
After years of dialysis, my child was big enough to receive my kidney. I donated my kidney to my elder child and dialysis is no longer needed. The new kidney would last about twenty years hopefully.
During my transition out of OBS, I thought that if I did not manage to transit out, I will pursue my Masters. If I did, then I will forgo the Masters. However, as I was transiting into RSAF, I got greedy and attempted to do both. Shortly after donating my kidney, I managed to complete my Masters with a second class honours as well.
Forging forward.
As I was contemplating my next move having “paid my dues”, my downgrade in PES grade was the final piece for me to make up my mind to close this chapter. I am deeply grateful to the RSAF for supporting me in my journey and I am looking for a role which allows me to make full use of the skills, experience and insights I have acquired from my journey. The beauty of our defence policy is that I will still be able to contribute as an NSmen in our defence and I remain deeply committed to our security and peace.
What’s ahead is unknown. But looking at how I emerge as who I am today starting out as a delinquent, I thought it has been a spectacular journey.
I intend to write about my experiences in a book eventually and I hope it gives strength to others who walked a different path in life.
